


Tomato Sauce

by wet_flesh_thunderclap



Category: Slash and Burn (Podcast)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2020-03-20 16:25:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18996259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wet_flesh_thunderclap/pseuds/wet_flesh_thunderclap
Summary: Steve takes a bunch of acid before the record, what ensues might surprise you. Or it might not if you know Steve like I do!





	1. Acid haze

**Author's Note:**

> It’s really hard to write Chris without writing Christ.
> 
> I speak (and write) the Queen’s English, not США burger drivel. Comment on this all you like but colour has a ‘u’ in it, and s’s are often better than z’s.
> 
> PLEASE NOTE: I do not own any of the rights to these characters and don’t profit from this work!

Steve looked down over his belly at his throbbing member. Globs of precum dripped onto the exquisite linoleum kitchen tiling. The Escher-esque graphics moved like puddles of water as the fluid hit them – _thud, thud, **thud**_. Maybe it was his already deranged mind, maybe it was the LSD which he had taken earlier. Come to think of it however, could he even remember taking it? Standing in the kitchen naked, he pondered… He remembered now, Kera had been upset about it – taking acid just before they were about to record – he remembered her face, one of absolute disgust as he grinned, knowing how it infuriated her.

Thinking that the come up would last through the first couple of more placid stories, he had slipped the tab under his tongue hoping for it to really hit when they got to the real wild stuff at the end. It had turned out quite differently to that, Steve mused as he stood there, the walls vibrating, moving with swirling paisleys. He ran his fingers down his shaft, rubbing at the head of his cock. He wondered how sex must feel in this state – where reality was dissolving around him – and eagerly awaited Chris’ arrival to find out.

_Fear is how I fall_

_Confusing what is real_

Kera had left halfway through the record. Steve’s incessant giggling (not at the assigned readings but just in his acid haze) and his obsession with the snowball microphone as his pupils dilated further had quickly drawn her ire. Her breasts heaved as she huffed out of the house, Meghan following her, breasts heaving in a similar fashion.

“He’s been bad before, off his meds, like when he went to the hospital…” Meghan trailed off.

“Nothing like this though, he’s fucking naked in the kitchen!” Kera retorted, shocked at her first use of the word ‘fuck’ in recent memory.

As the two women considered the plight of Steve, a red Maserati pulled up to the curb, tricked out speakers blasting ‘Crawling’. Chris’ hard body stepped out from behind the door on the other side of the car. Both ladies felt their respective vaginas moisten as Chris’ rock-hard abs grinned at them from between an unbuttoned dress shirt, which fluttered behind him, despite there being no wind to speak of.

_My walls are closing in_

“Hey girls, I hear Steve’s in a little trouble?”

“Yeah, he’s tripping something fierce,” Meghan replied.

“I told him he would think he was a fucking orange, but he didn’t listen to me, as usual,” Kera practically screamed the last part, still shocked at her utilisation of such ungodly language.

“Well let me go on in, and I’ll see if I can’t sort him out. I’ve managed to before, after all,” Chris smirked, remembering when Steve had lost one of his valuable MTG cards and thrown himself into a fit of rage, almost strangling a tournament opponent before Chris wrestled him to the ground.

Christ walked into the kitchen. Steve was guzzling from a bottle of tomato sauce. Strange… eating was usually the last thing on his mind when Chris was tripping, but then again, Steve was a pretty fucking strange guy. As he turned to face Chris, some of the sauce dripped down from Steve’s chin onto his chest, running down into his pubic hair.

“Fancy a gulp?” Steve asked.

“Not unless you have any sweet chilli as well,” Chris smirked.

“All the more for me,” Steve grinned, the sauce coating his teeth and lips in a horrifying visage.

“Seriously though Steve,” Chris crossed his arms over his chest. “What the actual fuck, do you even see yourself right now, you’re naked and drinking tomato sauce from the bottle. Also, why is the floor so fucking wet”?

Steve couldn’t stop ogling Chris’ hard body. He was well endowed, but Steve already knew that, having perved on Chris whenever he was in Steve’s bathroom. Steve had rigged up the multi-cam setup for that exact scenario. Christ, what he wouldn’t give for a taste, merely one fucking lick was all he needed. Sure, more would be welcome if it was on offer, but one fucking lick. Seriously, was that too much to ask? Chris’ pecs swirled around his nipples, which seemed to expand and contract. Steve was mesmerised, his hole puckered as his eyes swivelled and focused back on Chris’ now hardening member.

_Consuming_

_Confusing_

_This lack of self-control I fear is never-ending_

“Chris, will you take me?”

“Take you where? You are so fucking gone Steve, I’d be surprised if you could get out of this kitchen, let alone the house”

“No, take me right here and right now Chris.” Steve said, his eyes half shut, biting his lower lip. “I’m so fucking ready for you.” He rubbed the sauce around his cock and fondled his now red ballsack. In Steve’s current state of mind, the sauce felt like the finest moisturiser he had ever used. The sugary paste worked its way into his pores and clung to his pubes stickily.

Chris licked his lips. Kera wasn’t into the food stuff and had made that very clear when he had entered the room on their wedding night, wearing nothing but a Cheesel cockring – “I’m your wife, not a starving African child,” She had said sternly to him. After the removal of the salty treat she had still complained about the flecks of flavouring Chris had refused to wash off.

But here was Steve, practically begging for it, and with one of Chris’ favourite condiments spread all over him to boot… Chris whipped off his leather chaps, the Velcro quick releases tearing apart as his hairy, muscled thighs came into full view. Steve whimpered.


	2. The duality of man: to suck dick or eat ass?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that Chris’s intentions are clear, what will Steve do to satiate him, and how are the womenfolk to react?

Chris’s cock slapped lewdly against his inner thighs, the head glistening as it escaped the turtleneck of foreskin. Steve stared, mouth agape as the forest of Chris’s pubes breathed, individual hairs frolicking and rolling about one another. Here it was, his wish fulfilled. No longer was it necessary to scroll through his small (but admittedly growing and high resolution as well as  bitrate) video collection of Chris’s bathroom escapades, at least not today.

“Can I...”? Steve was lost for words. Partly because the situation was so unbelievable, but doubtlessly also because 400 micrograms of lysergic acid dithylamide is quite a lot. Even for a big fat guy.

“Well I’m not sure what part of this situation would indicate that I would be opposed to you doing so” Chris replied to the dumbstruck Steve. “So go on, we both know what you want.”

Steve needed to be told twice because he was so inebriated. After Chris again invited him to suckle at the font he approached, dropping to his knees. This was that same font Steve had desired for so long, through the late years of his high school sexual awakening, his years away from home at college, and after his return and marriage. “I’m not gay... this isn’t gay... it’s just Chris,” how could this be anything but heterosexual? This was no denial, this was heterosexual love between men. Well at least in one direction. But now Steve saw the obvious, the feelings went both ways...

And so they went. Steve, with sauce still dripping from his testes onto the linoleum below, cupped the other man’s balls in his palm, using his other hand to grasp that object which had been of his fascination for so long - Chris’s cock. He opened his mouth to take it in. It fit like a key for a deadbolt lock and had the corresponding level of satisfaction in the unlocking of one, which both parties were quite amenable to. Steve’s tongue stretched to where Chris’s cock met his balls and lapped back towards the tip, which brushed around the head and over Chris’s slit. Steve lent in to take the whole thing into his mouth, his brain still playing catch-up, like being plastered in a strip club with a private show from the best dancing, but perhaps not the best looking, girl there.

After a minute or so, the quality, if tiresome, suckage had to come to an end, as there was much more on the cards, for this evening and many to come. Steve was out of breath as he had neglected to breathe through his nose, as anyone who actually knows how to give head would have been doing. Steve, while not a bad cocksucker, was much inexperienced when it came to the male on male heterosexual domain.

Meanwhile, the womenfolk waited outside, the conversation had turned from Steve’s plight and Kera was in the middle of regaling Meghan about that time she was almost in a knife fight at the Wawa. Soon though, the they did begin to wonder what their husbands could possibly be up to. “We should probably check up on them, it’s been a few minutes and if Chris hasn’t convinced him to get dressed by now, maybe we can try together,” Kera’s sandy yellow hair flew behind her head as the wind picked up, and Meghan’s breasts shuffled slightly as they walked towards the house. They both thought they could hear the telltale sounds of a dick being sucked as they went though the front door, but this seemed like such an unlikely situation to the both of them that neither mentioned it to the other. Not to worry though, there was no dick being sucked at all, instead, Steve was lapping at Chris’s third eye, and this was the scene the two women witnessed as they entered the kitchen; Steve in nothing but his birthday suit, and Chris with only his billowing white music-video-boyband shirt, the latter propped on the kitchen counter, legs akimbo, as Steve’s tongue worked just as hard as it had on Chris’s cock, probing hard at the unlubricated hole. Both women could have sworn that Chris’s manpussy winked at them between Steve’s attentions, but as you might imagine, they were both in some degree of shock so were not able to convey to anyone, let alone each other, what each thought they had seen.

Chris looked away from his butt butler’s admittedly excellent spit-shining (Steve had never been with another man, but this was not to say that he wasn’t well experienced in the eating of ass) over at the two women. Meghan was the first to even slightly comprehend what was happening but first she had to pinch her arm to convince herself of the the reality of this unholy visage. Even as Kera began to understand that her husband was being eaten out by her co-host her mind began to shut down to protect itself from further damage. She fainted and Megan had to quickly go into action to prevent her head slamming against the corner of a glass coffee table, which might have had even worse consequences than seeing what she just had.


End file.
